Author: Ivan Bellman

  • The ViM Diaries ~ To the Manor Unborn

    I hope it�s Allen who drives me to the airport. His pirated copy of The Chronic 2001 allows me to chill in the basement of my brain. Allen is one of the drivers for the residential hotel that the ViM has been living in for the last two years. I have been here a month.…

  • Ivan Bellman is Blimey McEngland!

    I wanted to hate the play. I don’t know why. I just did. Maybe it’s because I am on currently on a Baby Tour of London (“Bellman’s British Baby Blitzkrieg” was the alternate title of this hit). So I am not really kicking my normal theater binge styley. But I could not resist a relatively…

  • Trapped in Iowa�s Puzzle Locker with Ivan Bellman (Part None)

    I thought I would open this series with a little email feud between two University Theater Journalists . . . Dum di Dum’s stint as academic Theater Fag Hag is all too familiar. But perhaps some Freshman somewhere will read this and switch her major back to philosophy . . . I’m only trying to…

  • Breaking the Windy City (Part 1.5 of like 3 or 4 . . . a slight Detour on the Road to Normal)

    When last we left our hero, Ivan of the Bellmans, he was about to roll-up on a pool party in Chicago with the cast of PERICLES, now running at the Goodman. The name of the game was Water Polo but we have some hurdles to jump before I can lay my skizielles to bear on…

  • Sex with Mutant Farm Animals (and other tales of the Two-Headed Calf) by Ivan Bellman

    “Now this is not the end. It is not even the beginning of the end. But it is, perhaps, the end of the beginning.” –Winston Churchill I am writing a book. It is a chronicle of my artistic suicide, which coincides with my post-vagina dentate addiction to Jack Daniels™. Having just finished a chapter on…

  • A Sober Attempt

    [Ed. note: reader response to Ivan Bellman’s Collapsible Giraffe piece was so overwhelming we’ve decided to invite him to contribute on an ongoing basis. Heaven help us. Currently he is traveling around the country as a member of the NEA/TCG CDP. What follows is the first of what we hope will be many missives from…

  • letters from the earth or somewhere

    I was supposed to go to the show. Goodness knows I had ample opportunity, but I never made it. I felt pretty bad about it, but what can you do. Then I got this in my email inbox this morning, a forwarded forward of a mass email from one Ian Belton of a review by…